Monday, October 4, 2010

In denial

This pregnancy has gone by in weird chunks. There's the first bit, where you're convinced that you're going to be sick for the rest of eternity (because that's just how long the first trimester lasts). Then time lurched its way along to now - 24 weeks. Sprinkle/Baby Star Wars/Nameless Fetus is apparently the size of a Chicago dog... at least according to the last 'this week in your pregnancy' update I read with Minnie, who is obsessed with knowing how big the baby is. So there you go.

Mmmmm, Chicago dog...

Anyway, I'm more than halfway through this pregnancy and I'm still waiting to feel excited. Forget excited, I'm willing to settle for one day without intense baby-related stress. Where is the call-in show or helpful newspaper advice column for my questions?

Dear Addie - My oldest daughter had terrible colic and didn't sleep a full night until she was two years old. If we repeat this trend, how will I keep from throwing myself off the deck? And what will I do with the two sprained wrists that is all that will result from throwing myself off the deck?

Dear Addie - There is a juvenile Labrador retriever masquerading as my four-year-old son. How will I keep this oversized, energetic, slobbering animal from tackling a newborn baby?

And speaking of two older children, dear Addie, how will I keep them from feeling neglected, forgetting to do their homework, going to school dressed like street urchins, eating nothing but Pop Tarts and eventually sinking into a life of crime and door-to-door alarm sales?

Maybe this seems excessive, but these are the kinds of worries that keep me from sleeping at night and from doing absolutely anything to prepare for the baby during the day. I have a big box of boy clothes waiting to go through - it sits. People are asking if there are things that we need - I pretty much don't think about it. Eventually I need to move the two existing children into one room to get the other ready for baby - I don't. I can't figure out what is wrong with me.

I have issues. That's what blogs are for, right?

7 comments:

The Mathews Family said...

Oh and I'm convinced that we should vote a pregnant woman into the White House next go around. Just think of what a gestating Commander in Chief could do with the state of our country if they stayed awake all hours of the night solving every last little problem of the universe. lol!
-J

fauxy said...

Love love love your writing! Came across your blog through blog stalking and I'm glad I did! My blog is private and nowhere near as interesting, but I'd be happy to invite you if you like. My email is holly_lamaja@yahoo.com. I have a feeling this little baby will be nothing short of an angel!

Missy said...

Remember how newborns love to sleep? That is how I've been able to spend quality time with the older nuggets... AND they love having a baby brother around to 'help' with. Our four year old still does his own thing and likes to perform in front of the baby. It's not so bad.
You are going to be great. The baby is going to melt your tender heart. Your family will be blessed.

Liz said...

If you're lucky, you'll get a good sleeper and your other kids will love the new addition and the freedom they have to be really naughty when you're occupied being a new baby mom again.
But if you're like me, you'll get one kid that starts wetting the bed again, one who thinks he's a rodent, and had nightmares about donkey from Shrek in his bed, and you'll have at least 1.5 kids in bed with you at different occasions each night. I don't know how I'm surviving on 4-5 broken up hours of sleep a night. But people tell me it will get better. Of course they're really old people and don't fall asleep in grocery store lines from exhaustion. Then again, maybe they do.
So, if that is how you are, call me at 3:00 am. I'll be up. Misery, (even misery for a good cause) loves company.

Sudar Clan said...

Jeri,
Try to relax!! Everything will work out. You are going to love that little baby boy the second you see him and so is the rest of the family. You will find time for everything, I know it doesn't seem that way right now, but it all works out. Call me, I would love to talk to you or go out to lunch. We can laugh and cry about it together.
Chrissy

Charlo said...

It will all be better when shehe is the size of 1.5 chicago dogs.

lori parkhurst said...

Congrats on your upcoming boy. So exciting!